I am hopelessly unorganized.
There. I admit it. Its out there in the universe for you all to see…
I am unavoidably messy.
Yup. I leave my clothes in a pile at the EXACT spot where I took them off. And they will remain there for quite some time.
I am perpetually distracted.
I find myself trying very hard to focus on details and specifics. And yet my poor little brain just wanders away around detail number 4 and starts thinking about something pretty I saw last month.
Now, don’t get me wrong. This is not a “wow… I wish I was like so and so but I just have to accept myself the way I am” post. If I was writing about myself 5 years ago – that is exactly what it would have been. But I have made peace with the way I am. I recognize the talents and gifts that God has given me cause me to think a bit differently – and I’m ok with that.
BUT – that doesn’t mean that I don’t try and work on these areas of inadequacy. I mean, the fact of the matter is, I do have 4 children who need to be properly fed and clothed; who need permission slips filled out and teeth cleaned, so I recognize the importance of all things “responsible.”
And so, I’ve tried to help myself out a bit by filling my life with tools to help me get a little bit more organized. I have a big family calendar where I try and write everything down so I don’t forget. I put my kids school notes in a specific place on the fridge so I can see what they need to bring to school each day. I flag emails that I need to respond to. I make lists and notes and remind my sister to remind me to remind my husband about stuff. I’m trying.
I am realizing that if you have a “weakness” – its really important to KNOW it – OWN it – and DO SOMETHING about it. Surround yourself with things and people who can help you work through it. Oh my – am I thankful for the people who have come around me in my areas of ministry who send emails, organize decorations, recruit volunteers, and handle all the stuff I STINK at.
I was thinking today about how lost I would be without my calendar. How its just the right tool for me – and if I USE it, I can keep myself from falling behind on all kinds of things.
And then I started thinking about the other areas that I am weak in. My propensity for people pleasing. The way I can speak gossip or negativity without a second thought. The temptations that I find my heart gravitating to over and over again. What am I doing about THOSE areas of vulnerability?
We all have weaknesses. You’ve got to OWN them – KNOW them – and DO SOMETHING about them.
Are you tempted to worry? Then write out all the scriptures you can find that assure you of God’s faithfulness and His command to pray instead of fretting. Give yourself some tools to help your mind fight the battle of anxiety.
Are you finding yourself overspending? Then don’t put yourself in a situation where you can spend money. Put away those credit cards. Don’t wander around Target when you’re bored. Recognize the times where you are tempted to comfort yourself with “stuff” and choose instead to run to Jesus.
Are you finding yourself a little too excited to see that guy at the gym who isn’t your husband? Then, sweet friend… KNOW IT – OWN IT – and do EVERYTHING in your power to RUN from that temptation. Tell a friend. And NOT the friend who will giggle about it and encourage you. Tell the friend that will rip up your membership and show up at every class and make sure you don’t do something stupid.
I think sometimes we find ourselves in a mess because we just aren’t honest enough about the areas we are not strong in. If we would be purposeful in addressing our spiritual weakness instead of ignoring them or trying to hide them – I think a LOT more of us would find healing and the strength to overcome those flaws and failures.
So just be honest with yourself and then get to work in finding the right tools for the job. You’ll be SO glad you did.
Now, where did I put that calendar?